“Bisexual Tendencies”

So I get out of the shower today to a string of text messages from my best friend (biff) who is currently living in France.

“Hey are you busy?”


“I’m gonna spam you”

which then turned into…

“I need to gossip. And you’re the only one I can gossip to about this!”

“For the love of all things holy”

“I’m drunk and I need you”

It’s safe to say that I was a little concerned. Especially because biff is not the type of person to ever say the words “I need you”. It’s funny how we found each other – two people who are terrible at communicating have been best friends for 17 years.

Anyways, turns out. There’s this girl who biff has a crush on and it’s totally cool – we’ve known biff was bisexual for years now. However, it’s so difficult to tell whether this girl is flirting with biff because she gets touchy when she has alcohol or if she is also into the lady regions.

Which brings me to this rant of the land of spectrums. I love love love that society is moving towards being more open. But can we just discuss that it is so incredibly difficult to understand whether someone is bisexual or just has “bisexual tendencies?” I am not condemning them whatsoever – hell, I definitely get my fair share of lady crushes. However, I love the men. But I also enjoy making out with biff every now and then. It’s a confusing world we live in. I feel so terrible that biff has to worry about whether kissing this girl is going to scare the living bejesus out of her. How does one ask someone if it’s cool to kiss them? You don’t want to worry about ruining a friendship.

Yes, I know. “If they were a true friend, it shouldn’t matter and they should just take the compliment and move on.” But that’s not how it always goes. Especially when you’re living in France and your choice of American friends is pretty small. But basically, does anyone have any advice on how to approach this? The girl knows that biff is bisexual. And this girl holds her hand and cuddles but it hasn’t gone further than that. How does one tell if it’s just normal girl touchy-feely crap or if it’s more than that? Can she just ask her straight out or is that coming on too strong?

End rant. All is cool.

Stick to your roots,

Southern Charm


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